It’s true; it does take two to tango and good relationships do take two great partners although one great partner can influence a not-so-great partner to become better. And I do hope that you have come to the sad but true realization that you cannot change anyone but yourself; so what do you need to do to become a great partner?
1. Personal development. Yes, to be a great partner you need to be the best you that you can be so you need to keep developing as a person. What skills, interests and hobbies do you enjoy? How are you improving yourself so that you can become a better person, apart from your partner? Remember that you are your greatest asset so you need to keep growing and expanding who you are and your interaction with life and living. A great partner is one who is using their gifts and is completely engaged in life as they bring all that positive energy and joy of life into a relationship enlivening it into a good relationship. What do you need to change to become like this?
2. Be relevant in your relationship. You cannot get stuck in yesterday or the past, it’s done and over with. To be relevant means being aware of what is happening in your relationship and with your partner and being able to adapt quickly to the changes that are happening. Remember that what worked yesterday may not work today as you, your partner and your relationship are dynamic and you will all be changing and growing (or stagnating) as life and its challenges change. A great partner anticipates change, monitors the change and adapts quickly to that change. Do you anticipate change? Are you monitoring change in your partner and relationship? Are you adapting to the change or are you resisting change or denying its very existence?
3. Hang out with people with your values. Of course you should not discriminate against people but believe it or not you will be encouraged and strengthened by people who believe in strong relationships like you do and they will give you ideas that you can try in your own relationship. Remember ‘no man is an island’ so make sure you have some people who cheer you in your quest for a good relationship.
4. Use every opportunity to learn. You have had your bad moments or days when you have hit out at your partner unfairly or have misinterpreted your partner and imagined them maliciously hurting you. Whatever things have made you miserable in your relationship learn from them. You should not be stuck in the same situations, learn from your mistakes. Repeating the same mistakes over and over again is detrimental to a relationship and disrespectful to yourself and your partner. Are you constantly learning or do you keep doing the same negative things over and over?
5. Creativity is crucial to avoid stagnation and boredom in your relationship. You were born with creativity and you need to see the opportunities in your relationship and seize them. Recognize the needs of your partner and meet those needs. To be creative you need to be able to recognize opportunities for you to express that creativity and to seize those opportunities when they present themselves. When was the last time you used your creativity in your relationship?
To have a good relationship, you need to use these 5 keys to unlock your capacity to be a great partner. Remember you can be a great partner… and have a good relationship.
Author: Rosy Anderson