There is no doubt that negative attitudes can hold you back in life, leaving you feeling stuck, angry and depressed. Life is viewed as a struggle, full of continual problems and you may find yourself becoming overly-preoccupied by a problem or a past mistake. You might find yourself thinking “I can’t do that” or “Nothing ever goes right for me”. And guess what? What you think and tell yourself usually comes true. You discover that you cannot do the task at hand and everything goes wrong – just like you told yourself. We’ve all heard of self-fulfilling prophesies and we’ve all heard of negative energy too. Negative attitudes only serve to continue your feelings of powerlessness and failure. All in all, negativity stops you from living your life fully and successfully.
So you need to ask yourself and be honest: Are your negative attitudes holding you back in life? Are they stopping you from doing what you want? Do you complain a lot? Do you often look at other people and think that they are in some way luckier or more fortunate than you are and lack the everyday problems you face? You probably feel that these people have some sort of secret, that their lives are charmed, which leaves you feeling very hard done by and even more negative about life.
The truth is that next to nobody leads a truly charmed and problem-free life. Life IS full of problems, as simple as that. The crucial thing is how we react to those problems – whether we view them as troublesome (negative) or as opportunities (positive). If you have negative attitudes to everything in your life, you will find problems threatening and immobilizing. You will feel trapped and fearful, seeing everything as a catastrophe. People with positive attitudes will focus on the benefits to be found. A redundancy, for example, is seen as a chance to pursue a new career; a broken relationship gives the chance to learn invaluable lessons about love and implement them in the next relationship when that comes along. Positive attitudes open up your world. They are far more powerful than negativity and can infuse you with a sense of amazing power. And by power, I mean the sort of personal power that benefits you and those around you.
So, how can you stop negative attitudes from holding you back and develop a positive attitude instead? Luckily, it’s not as difficult as many believe. Follow these steps and you’ll soon be realising your hopes, ambitions and dreams rather than allowing negative attitudes to hold you back.
As soon as a negative thought pops into your mind, immediately turn it into a positive image. Visualize something beautiful, relaxing, pleasant, amusing or exciting. Keep in mind what you want to achieve in life. Don’t worry if the negative thought is persistent – it takes a little time to change the habit! But persevere and you will get there.
Keep a diary
Writing is a powerful and positive tool. You can reflect on your thoughts and feelings in a diary, secretly vent your anger and frustration. However, rather than use a diary to voice your negative attitudes, write only about the things that are going well in life and things you are grateful for – you’ll be surprised at how many positive events happen on a daily basis.
Learn to relax
You are more likely to think negatively if you are stressed out, so it’s important to learn how to relax. Adopt a method that works for you (this may involve some trial and error) whether that is yoga, meditation, walking or gardening. When you feel relaxed, positive attitudes can flourish more easily.
Let affirmations be your friends
There are loads of books on the market about affirmations. Pick one you like and read it every day. Repeat your affirmation regularly, for example: “I am a success” or “My life is going well”. Remember to keep the affirmations in the present tense. They truly are a powerful way of bringing positive attitudes into your life.
Embrace the present moment
Negative attitudes very often hold us back when we worry or have fears about the future or hold regrets and sadness about the past. You have to let go and live in the moment, live now. The present is the only time we really have. Enjoy the precious moments you have – having a positive attitude will help you achieve this.
Author: Kristin Hutchings